Claiming Your Calm has been one of the most powerful parts of my own healing journey, and in this conversation between Tracy Malone and me, we talk about exactly how to regulate your emotions when you’re triggered—especially when you’re dealing with a narcissist.
Have you ever felt completely fine one moment and then suddenly overwhelmed, panicked, or flooded with emotion? You’re not “back at square one”—you’re triggered. In fact, your nervous system is simply doing what it learned to do to keep you safe. Understanding this is the first step toward freedom.
In this episode, Claiming Your Calm: How to Regulate Your Emotions When Dealing with a Narcissist, of The Narcissist Podcast, we explore how to move from emotional chaos back into grounded calm.
Why Narcissists Trigger Such Intense Emotional Responses
Narcissists are masters at finding your emotional buttons. Consequently, their words or behaviors often activate deep wounds, especially those formed in childhood. Because of this, your nervous system may interpret their actions as threats, even when you’re safe in the present. Recognizing this pattern allows you to respond differently.
How Trauma Gets Wired Into the Nervous System
Over time, repeated emotional stress wires your nervous system into a state of hyperalertness. As a result, you may live on high alert, waiting for the next attack. The good news is that these patterns can be rewired through conscious awareness, self-soothing, and compassionate practice.
Signs You’re Becoming Dysregulated Before You “Flip”
Before you lose your calm, your body gives you signals—tightness in your chest, shallow breathing, racing thoughts, or heat in your face. Therefore, noticing these early signs allows you to intervene before the full wave hits.
Try pausing, taking three slow breaths, and feeling your feet on the ground. Even a small shift in awareness can change the trajectory of your day.
Breathwork Tools to Settle Your System Fast
Breathwork is one of the fastest ways to calm the nervous system. For example, try the 4-8 technique:
Inhale through your nose for 4 counts.
Exhale gently for 8 counts.
Repeat three times. As a result, your heart rate slows, your body relaxes, and you regain your sense of control.
The Power of Co-Regulation and Connection
Although self-regulation is important, co-regulation—feeling safe in connection with another person—is equally vital. Healing happens in a relationship. Therefore, seek out supportive friends, therapists, or communities who can hold a safe space for your emotions.
Stop Letting Triggers Steal Your Whole Day
When you learn to regulate your emotions, triggers become teachers rather than tyrants. Instead of losing hours to emotional spirals, you can pause, breathe, and return to your calm center. In doing so, you reclaim your peace, your power, and your ability to choose your response.
Listen Now
If you’re dealing with a narcissist, feeling easily triggered, or tired of emotional spirals running your life, this episode will help you claim your calm, find your center, and take your power back.
🎧 Listen here or on your favorite podcast platform.
Key Takeaway
Healing doesn’t mean you’ll never be triggered—it means you’ll know how to bring yourself back. Through breathwork, awareness, and compassionate connection, you can regulate your emotions and live from your highest calm.
