Here is my blog on the greatest blessing and the greatest challenge.
“What is your greatest blessing?” my teacher asked.
“This moment.” I answered.
“What is your greatest challenge?”
“Accepting and relaxing into the moment.”
I surprised myself when I said this.
It was a spontaneous response… and it rang so true, though I didn’t know it at the time.
This is a dilemma I face as a person recovering from trauma and chronic pain…
I’m learning to trust the Universe.
I am making progress in breaking up the regularity and strength of this pattern.
Boy, do I have a part of me that is completely resistant to this idea of trusting what is here.
So much so, that I as I do the work to heal, I notice more and more often how much tension I hold just as a habit
… tension that is not required to handle whatever I am doing
… just tension.
It’s as if I am trying to somehow push the moment,
control the outcome.
Well, there’s the master addiction, right?
Or buying into the illusion that I have control.
That’s what we do as people experiencing pain chronically –
we try and change the moment into something more comfortable.
We try and escape the moment.
I hear this so often from people who live with chronic pain or are in recovery from it.
For me, I have an old belief that still lives strongly enough in me to color the moment.
It tells me that I’m not safe, that I should contract, or hide altogether.
It tells me whatever I am doing is not enough.
This resistance –
it is an old pattern running under a story,
a belief that what is showing up in the moment isn’t enough.
Well who am I to tell the Universe how to show up?
Maybe It’s trying to get my attention.
Maybe there is a lesson to learn here.
Maybe this moment will continue so long as I try and dodge the lesson sitting right here.
I’m not saying don’t take a stand for or against an issue or to become a doormat.
I’m saying accept as reality what is happening without a denial or a dodge.
… and move from there.
Unleash your healing power… let go.
Trust the moment.
Accept what is showing up.